Happy B'day!

(about the pic the photographer said-A teddy bear sitting on a grave of a women called "Paula". I don't know her but based on her year of birth, I'm guessing that the teddy bear was a gift from a grandchild)

There is a girl who lives in house in front of mine, 

sweet n simple but with a heart which is divine.

When things are not right... all u need is her sweet smile. 

For it to become a special day jus be with her for a while.

She knows the sense in stupidity... 

Can make even a toothache a calamity!

She wants to b a child when she grows old... 

Got the spirit of hurricane, no one can keep her on hold.

She is the one who made my life pretty easy

 n she hates it when i say the word 'busy'.

hey nutty, my tooti-frooti, there something i want to tell u truely... 

No matter wt u think bt i belong to u already!

plea for death!

i don't know how or why

but i did something 

which i ...didn't meant to try

i don't know

is it false or true 

that i am

already in love with you

i meant to

stop and wait

but i fear it to be

too late!

i don't know wt to do,

i trust you!

but am I 

being true?

you put it all so simply

but for me it's not that easy

dun ask me questions

dun gimme a choice

kill me for once

n my soul is for you to rejoice!

i can't give my heart alone.. u gotta keep my soul!

Ca⋅dav⋅er⋅ous life!

I miss living my life...

The way I used to smile...

The way I used to cheer up and say hi

To the faces known- unknown who use to pass by!

 

Now all I think is about loss

The borrowed pain and the imposed gloss

The cruelty being wrapped in morality

The evil face of my own divinity

 

The face which looks back from mirror

...is not mine!

The eyes are same but they reflect shame

...instead of shine!

 

When my own people touch me... 

I don't feel a thing!

For a moment I do see them smiling

But then I blink!

 

It’s as if I am watching my life

...from a glass door

They are calling my name

..But I could hear no more!

 

I am beating the glass, asking them for help

They think I am being snobbish n giving them hell

They r going away n all they feel for me is sorrow n despise

I am helpless n weak but they leave me crying

 

It is not even a nightmare

It is real... it's the animal in me and is alive

I am scared, am panting inside and screaming

Gimme back my life...

 Gimme back my life!

oh man.. when it happened? i feel so trapped in myself... i want a escape.. i want out!